Artistry By Means of Words

Sometimes…

I wonder just how long you’ll play this game.

I wonder just how much you mean what you say.

I wonder just how much you miss me throughout the day.

I wonder is it really what it seems or is there something more that I just can’t seem to see.

I wonder did you ever really venture into this with good intentions at all.

But then Sometimes,

I just hate you.

I just wish you would leave me alone forever.

I just want you to hurt like I do.

I just want you to be truthful.

I hate that I actually love/loved you the way I do/did.

-KJ-

 

Storms

The clouds hovered for oh so long,

They became  quite the norm. 

The rain never bothered just slowed down the pace,

I was just glad it hid the tears on my face. 
The wind became stronger, the thunder loudly roared,

The beat of my heart became shallow,

I just quitely ignored. 
The pain was overtaking my body,my soul, my spirit,

My heart daily cracking and you refused to hear it.

But now the storms have passed, 

the clouds slowly moving away.

I’ve learned quite a deal of patience.

So I’ll just wait to finally see a sunny day. 

Daily Post

Morning Ramblings 

Why are we so consumed in the daily antics of others who only thrive to devour our ambition? Why do we pollute our minds with such negative the thinking patterns about ourselves? 
It’s time to change those thought patterns. Time to release our minds of the daily toxins that inhabits and overtakes our control system. Replace those thoughts with positive thoughts about yourself ad the environment you’re in. Become a “glass half full ” type of person. 

Having an optimistic approach to life relieves so much stress and promotes a healthy mental psyche. 
Try it today. You are beautiful, you are loved, and you are deserving of happiness! 
KJ

{HeR}

Somewhere along the destructive paths of life, Her eyes were lost behind the pain.

Her heart became barricaded by a steel wall, leaving no room for entry.

Her desire to love diminished with the betrayal of her recent lover.

The epitome of hurt resided in her soul and the anger dangerously hovered.

The depth of the hurt and anguish she desperately tried to cover.

In the midst of the chaos that could have derailed her fragile soul,

Though the hurt dangled over her head daily her desire became bold.

She found something quite unique, something that seemed to comfort her being,

Something that quieted her very thoughts, her pain, her need for love.

It replaced external desires that taunted her shattered heart,

It replaced her need for companionship, the need to give her heart to another.

She held on to it with the highest grip of hope and it was best for her!

She found herself before the love, before the companion, before the friend,

Once she embraced HER, She fell in love and those desires blossomed within.

She only desires to indulge in the sweetest love with HERself.

 

 

|Reading|

Why is it that after you’ve removed yourself from situations or people that you seemed forced to (or you’re expected to) read between the lines? 

After a recent breakup, I’m sure there are feelings that are still hovering around for both parties. However, there’s always the one person that feels as though they have to pretend their feelings aren’t still there. This one person always expects the other to read between their exterior defense mechanism. 

Why is this? What’s the problem with letting your feelings show if they’re genuine for that person? Espefially if you both know that the current situation you’re in isn’t really what you both want. 

I’ve overcome the need and want to hide behind my feelings. It took me years to discover that hiding behind my feelings only made things worst for me. My attitude would be so horrible for no reason to those who didn’t quite know me. Frankly, I began wanting better for myself, so I released. 

Now at first, I was releasing without a care in the worls about other folks feelings. So a lot of folks were hurt by things I said or did. I had to find that balance to where I would be free of harbored feelings and others would be offended by what I stated. 

This was yet another reason I began my meditation journey. I gave up trying to read between the lines of things and unknowingly forced folks to say what they actually meant by not participating in any mind games. 

Once I located an equal balance in myself, this was very easy to do. I no longer cared about the feelings of others and how they refused to show them. This was annoying one person so much that she began asking me how to find her zen. 

I chuckled. This was something I couldn’t really explain to her. I couldn’t help her with this. Finding that balance is something one has to desire to acheive on their own. 

I’m just happy that I decided to do so because I was on such a destructive path without finding balance in myself. No more reading between the lines for me. Either direct your feelings for me towards me or just leave me be. Either way, I’m happy with me!! 

Meditation: Day 1

Good Morning Loves,

I began my meditation challenge on Sunday evening. I want to make a log of the difference in my disposition and my over all feeling after morning/night meditation. Well, Sunday I tried something that was quite exhilarating. Like I’ve mentioned before, meditation and how you approach depends on the person.

I was doing some reading on different types of meditation when I thought about the different nature sounds that evoke tranquility for me. I love watching water. It gives me such positive energies and calms me tremendously. I stumbled across an article focused on water mediation. The author suggested that one would meditate while taking a bath.  This was quite interesting being that for most of us, that’s the only time we are genuinely alone for more than 5 minutes without chaos.

Many of us light candles and “relax” while enjoying the quiet. So why not use this time to stimulate balance and inner peace. That’s exactly what I did. While in the tub I had some soft nature sounds playing and I focused solely on my breathing. Those ten minutes where the best ten minutes I’ve experienced in a very long time. I felt so free! So renewed. So cleansed!

After that I was just a bubble of energy and delight. It was good to feel that way. I haven’t enjoyed such delight in a while. It amazed me that this could be achieved from ten minutes of alone time.

So, while in the tub, embrace your self. Become one with the water and let your worries, stress, negative energy wash off and drain out of your soul. It’s worth it trust me!

 

-Kae Jaye-